My biggest realization is how easy it is to slip away from awareness. I don’t mean to suggest
that I’m conscious all of the time. I spend most of my time in a semi?stupor state and only have brief
moments of clarity; and I’m not entirely sure that those moments are truly conscious . . . I mean, really .
. . how many levels of awareness are there?
Okay, that’s not actually my biggest realization in this experiment. My biggest realization is that
I’m okay with not being aware all of the time. I know that I can lessen the time spent in that semi?
stupor state by sadhana; and I know that I can decide to experience the journey, be it difficult or easy. I
know that the separate part of me that finds all of this hilarious helps me through those difficult times as
if I am pulling me forward, asking myself the entire time “do you get it yet?” I’m still answering myself
“Nope, not yet.” Still, I choose to practice. I choose to work toward experiencing every moment at
whatever level of consciousness I am in that moment. I am experiencing the journey.